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Monday, July 9, 2007

Resuscitating a Dying Friendship

They wouldn’t take “no” for an answer.

I have already blurted out all possible excuses from my deep reservoir of apologies, but nothing worked. Their instruction was for me to be at Gateway before 9:00 that evening. Little did I know that they were men on a mission.

Father Edwin and Kuya Jun, two of Taiwan’s more influential Filipino figures (grin) when I was there, were hell-bent on ending the four-year war between me and a former best friend. Maybe they got tired setting separate appointments each time they needed to catch up on either of us that they decided to put the matter into their hands.

What they were trying to patch up is a soured friendship – a friendship that looked quite strong in the beginning. We were two young expats, both representing government interests, who by virtue of work or circumstance, would normally go together to various Filipino gatherings. We were almost inseparable as we would later nurture a common set of friends. And since our pads were just beside each other, there really was not much room for privacy or individual pursuits.

It was when one tried to shield himself from too much intrusion that the knot was broken. He thought we were already invading hallowed private grounds (as in family affairs) when in truth we were not. You know how it is supposed to be with friends – there is more leeway for jokes and light banter. When one gets hot under the collar without understanding the context or real premise of the stories that get around, war ensues.

As a result, the sense of betrayal was high for both sides. And the resentment bred a mutual antagonism that was unimaginable early on. Your best friend can be your worst enemy, the cliché goes.

But time is yet the best healer. Looking back, it is now easy to recognize that the passions simply ran sky high at the time that we were actually over-reacting. Now, acceptably a more sober time, it is easy to let bygones be what they should and just move on with peace in the heart.

I’m thus thankful there are peacemakers. With pride running loose, it could only be through their firm intercession where the proverbial peace pipe can be smoked.

I’m glad I have regained or at least revived a friendship. Now I’m on a roll. I’ll make sure that my other broken bonds will soon be fixed.


gibbs cadiz said...

hmmm. eto ba yung kinwento mo re the shanghai trip? o iba pa? :)

Gypsy said...

Good on you, bro! Hope love is lovelier the second time around! :)

MANDAYA MOORE: Ang bayot sa bukid said...

nice. ang sarap ng feeling pag ganyan.

Té la mà Maria - Reus said...

We have been in his blog and have found it very interesting, congratulations regards from Catalonia - Spain

Tami said...


that's nice. =) i've had the same experience, although ako yung sa perspective ng 'peacemaker' hope all goes well with the other 'broken bonds' =D

carlotta said...

it feels good to have that burden lifted, isn't it?

aryo said...

Gibbs: Iba to. That one, I still have to fix. Soon I hope.

Gypsy: Love ka dyan! :-) Actually, I don't think we'll be treating the same way again. Medyo me lamat na e. But it's a good start.

Mandaya & Carlotta: Oo. Ayoko na ng me kaaway. Am now a leading advocate of world peace!

aryo said...

Te la Ma Maria - Thanks for dropping by. I visited your site. Unfortunately, my Spanish is poor.

Tami: Spread peace! Ayan, dalawa na tayong advocates of world peace.:-)